


Always Yours

by QuietKait



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Undertones, Endverse, Light Bondage, M/M, Orgasm Delay/Denial, possible angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-16
Packaged: 2017-12-29 13:59:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuietKait/pseuds/QuietKait
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Now it seemed that all he was good for was a pick me up; one stop relief for the man that Castiel knew must have loved him once. That was what he had to hold on to when Dean’s fingers were twisted tight in his hair, holding him still as he fucked into his mouth- the hazy memory of what they used to have."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Always Yours

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first try at an endverse fic, hope you like it! Possible angst, like with anything from the endverse, not too bad though.

It wasn’t always like this. No, Castiel remembered when it was sweet- ages ago, when there was still tenderness in Dean’s touch. Back before he had been tainted by what the world had become, before his guilt and anger had taken over and were the only things left for him to feel. Back when Castiel was powerful, before his grace had dwindled away like a dying flame and he was stranded in this shell- this weak and breakable death sentence- he had purpose. He was useful. Now it seemed that all he was good for was a pick me up; one stop relief for the man that Castiel knew must have loved him once. That was what he had to hold on to when Dean’s fingers were twisted tight in his hair, holding him still as he fucked into his mouth- the hazy memory of what they used to have.

The worst part wasn’t the bruises or the constant dull ache under his skin, Castiel had gotten used to those a long time ago. The worst part was the emptiness. The way Dean used to touch him, before everything fell, he would feel electric. Whole in ways that only Dean could make him. Dean would be gentle; running his hands lightly across Castiel’s skin, leaving trails of kisses down his body, teasing and slowly unraveling him until he came. He would stroke Castiel’s hair and whisper in his ear that he was his as Castiel came undone beneath him. 

Castiel ached for that. But if this was all he could get- his swollen lips stretched wide around Dean’s hard cock, saliva dripping down his chin and tears pricking the edges of his eyes as he struggled to breathe- he’d take it. Truth is, he didn’t matter how he got it, but he needed Dean. It hurt, the constant reminder of what used to be, knowing that it was gone now. But he’d give anything he had left just for the brief moments of closeness, even if all it brought was pain.

Dean knitted his fingers through Cas’ hair and pulled his head forward as he thrust deep into his throat, coaxing wet choking sounds from the fallen angel, “That’s right. You’ll take anything, won’t you?” 

It was true, when Dean wasn’t available Castiel would lay down with anyone who offered just to stave off loneliness, but he was never really there. Fueled by whatever drugs he was on that particularly day, he would close his eyes and let his mind drift somewhere far away; a place with cheap dirty motel rooms and late night diner food, where a little unlikely family would drive for days in an old black car, together against the world. A place where there was something- someone- to fight for. A place where Castiel was whole. 

He didn’t go there when he was with Dean. No, Castiel wanted to savor what little contact he could get from him. Even if it were just a twisted echo of what he remembered. 

Their time together hurt, left Castiel feeling hollow, but it was all Cas had left and he always wanted more. When Dean pulled his cock abruptly from Cas’ mouth, a thin trail of spit running from its tip to Cas’ reddened bottom lip, Cas whined in protest.

“Get up.” Dean ordered, gripping the base of his cock. 

Neither of them ever bothered getting completely undressed anymore. It was easier to just unzip and go. Dean often took Cas by surprise anyway, walking right into his cabin and taking what he wanted, and this way Dean didn’t have to waste time recollecting his clothes before leaving.

Cas hurriedly got to his feet, a little light headed from the sudden change (probably also from the brief lack of oxygen), and before he could get his bearings Dean was yanking him forward by his shirt. He attacked Cas’ still slick lips with his own in harsh, animalistic movements. He brushed his tongue over Cas’ swollen lips and was granted access inside immediately- Castiel never refused Dean anything. 

Dean’s tongue invaded Castiel’s mouth like he owned it (and these days, it seemed like he did). It was the same sweet taste with the spiced undertones that were always Dean’s, but with none of the affection that his kiss used to carry. It was empty and raw, but Castiel gladly accepted it over nothing- he had no other choice. 

Warm tendrils of need wormed their way under Castiel’s skin as Dean grabbed Cas’ hips and pulled them tight against his own. Dean’s saliva-wet cock was a heavy weight pressing against Cas’ growing hard on through his jeans as Dean slowly, firmly ground against him. Dean steadily pushed Cas backward, still connected at the mouth and keeping Cas flush against him, until Castiel’s skull hit the wall with an audible thud. Dean just laughed into Cas’ mouth as he palmed Cas’ hardening dick through his jeans with a callousness that was for his own violent enjoyment.

“Tell me how much you want this.” Dean breathed out against Cas’ ear, breaking their kiss and moving to grab Cas’ wrists.

“Dean,” Cas let out in a quiet moan; he savored these moments, “Please…”

Castiel’s wrists were swiftly pulled above his head with one hand as Dean stopped teasing Cas’ denim clad erection to tangle his other hand into Cas’ hair. He roughly yanked to the side, getting Cas to expose his throat as a low whimper escaped from it. Dean pressed tighter against Castiel’s human body and easily held him in place, reminding Cas how weak he really was now. He used to just pretend; back when he was filled with grace and could break free at any moment, he’d let Dean hold him still. Now he was truly pinned, stuck until Dean decided to let him move.

Dean licked a thick stripe up Castiel’s bared throat, punctuated by sucking unsympathetically just below his jaw, then licked and bit at his ear, “Please what?” Dean’s voice was rough and low and commanding, it made Castiel shiver.

“Please,” Cas grit his teeth and stifled a growl as Dean yanked his head back by his hair and nipped at his throat, finally painfully aware of how hard his cock was, “Fuck me, use me, I don’t care I just-“

Dean pulled away and Cas finally looked at him, into his hollow green eyes that used to shine, and realized he was waiting. Oh, right. Castiel held his gaze and was hesitant, but opened his mouth in spite of his better judgment.

“I need you, Dean.”

Those green eyes changed from something that might’ve been mistaken for caring to a look of disgust in 0.2 seconds. Bad decision. 

Cas was spun around fast enough to disorient him and slammed into the wall, “No, Angel,” Dean pinned Cas under the weight of his torso so he could reach around him and work at undoing Cas’ belt, “What you need is a lesson.”

Dean was angry, more so than usual. He only called Cas ‘Angel’ when he wanted to really hurt him, make him feel powerless. So, it’s gonna be another night like that then. 

Dean undid Cas’ belt and pulled it from the loops of his worn jeans. He forced his arms behind his back and tied the leather around his wrists in a makeshift restraint. Cas struggled against his bindings, more testing the strength than trying to break free. He wasn’t going anywhere.

Dean pressed Cas’ head against the wall with one hand and grit into his ear, “You’re mine, Angel.”

Castiel’s heart dropped again. But he needed this.

Dean unbuttoned Cas’ jeans and tore down the zipper while he mouthed at the nape of his neck as Castiel turned his head to rest his forehead against the cool wooden wall. Castiel’s achingly hard cock fell free as soon as Dean rid him of the confines of his clothes. 

“Look how hard you are already.” Dean squeezed and stroked Cas’ cock a little too firmly, pain sitting on the edge of the pleasure, waiting to take over.

Dean stroked Cas’ hair the way someone would pet a possession they’re fond of, “You’re such a slut for it, aren’t you Cas?” He rasped into Cas’ ear, voice dripping with sadistic pleasure that Castiel couldn’t help but arch back into with a moan, “That’s what I thought.”

Dean brought his hand around to Cas’ kiss-swollen mouth and hooked two fingers inside, forcibly turning his head so Dean could see.

“Suck,” he ordered, jamming his fingers in further, “just like you did so well with my cock.”

Cas nearly gagged, something that came with being human, but closed his eyes and sucked on Dean’s strong battle-rough fingers in earnest, running his tongue along them to make sure they were wet enough for what Dean was planning.

“You know what, angel? I’m gonna go slow,” Dean ground against Cas while he worked at his fingers, “So slow.”

Cas was confused; Dean hardly ever took his time now. Regardless, he moaned around Dean’s fingers as Dean resumed stroking his achingly rigid cock.

“I’m gonna spread you open so wide, Cas.” He licked up Cas’ neck to the sensitive spot behind his ear and whispered, “With just my fingers- Gonna get you so sloppy and open until you squirm beneath me, ‘til you can’t take it.” Cas arched back into Dean again, arousal building hot in his stomach at Dean’s words. “I want you begging for it like the whore you are.”

That last part was growled low and slow as Dean removed his now soaked fingers from Cas’ mouth. Castiel whined at the loss of contact. Dean let go of Cas’ cock and pressed between his shoulder blades to hold Cas tight against the wall. He firmly grabbed Cas’ ass, spreading the round mounds of muscle to grant him better access to the spot he intended to work until the man beneth him screamed for more. 

Dean trailed a wet finger lightly down Castiel’s back, agonizingly slow and leaving a chill, and began running it around his entrance. He lazily traced the ring of muscle and hot needles of anticipation started prickling under Cas’ skin as he felt his cock twitch in interest. He pressed into Dean’s touch and Dean bit into his shoulder.

“You’re so greedy,” Dean breathed hot against his skin, “We’re just getting started.”

Dean slipped one finger into Cas’ opening, and Cas felt him smile against his shoulder as he let a low groan fall from his lips. Dean worked his finger slowly in and out of Cas. It was nice, but it wasn’t enough.

Cas pressed his forehead to the wall again, “Dean, please… I-“ but he was cut off when Dean quickly slipped in another finger beside the first.

Castiel adjusted quickly to the new intrusion (not that his partner cared all that much) and Dean began scissoring his fingers open and sliding them in and out, still torturously slow. Cas could feel the white heat of arousal floating over his skin and was painfully aware of how hard he was. Beads of precome dripped from his untouched cock. He desperately wanted some kind of friction, but his hands were tied and Dean wasn’t going to touch him anytime soon. 

“Look at that,” Dean taunted, adding a dry third finger alongside the other two, “You’ll just take them all, won’t you? They slide in so easily. Such a whore, Cas.”

Cas moaned loudly at the feeling of Dean’s digits inside of him, a dull burning pain floating along the edges of the erratically building pleasure. Dean resumed scissoring his fingers inside of Cas, stretching him wide, and Cas bit his lip and groaned to keep from crying out as Dean twisted his fingers and hit that bundle of nerves inside of Castiel that set him on fire.

As Dean worked that spot inside of him Cas could feel his orgasm approaching and, as amazing as it felt, he hated it. He hated that this shadow of the Dean he used to know could still do this to him; make him come undone, untouched. But it felt so good, so raw. Cas knew that this was all he could get from Dean now- probably all that he deserved- this cold, unattached fucking. And he would take it.

Castiel could feel warm light spreading through him, a void that used to house his grace being filled with insurmountable need. His breath came in deep gasps and moans, his skin was covered in light droplets of sweat, the palm of Dean’s free hand against his back felt unyieldingly warm, electric- He was so close to coming; just a light touch to his leaking cock is all it would take. Dean twisted his fingers in deeper, and Cas realized that he didn’t even need a touch to send him over the edge.

But that wasn’t how Dean wanted to play. 

“Not yet, angel.” Dean whispered against Castiel’s ear as he removed his hand from his back and tightly squeezed the base of Cas’ dick to deny him release, “I told you, I want you begging for it.”

Castiel cried out in frustration and banged his head against the wall, gritting his teeth. Of course Dean wouldn’t let him have this, it was too easy. Dean was still working his fingers inside of him though, fist tight around his cock keeping him from coming. It was agonizing.

When Dean removed his fingers Cas whined at the loss, though there was some relief that came with it. He wasn’t as desperate for release without the stimulation, but he still wanted Dean inside of him. Cas got what he wanted, needed, when Dean, after a few strokes to his own dick, slid deep into Castiel in one smooth motion. 

Dean was definitely thicker than three fingers, stretching Cas open with a burn that, at this point, he welcomed. It wasn’t quite wet enough, but Cas relished in the feeling of having Dean filling him, it was the closest he could get without crawling inside of his skin. He missed the feeling of having him close.

Dean began slow thrusting in and out of Cas and continued to squeeze the base of Cas’ painfully hard cock in his strong fist. He took his other hand and gripped Cas’ hip, the vice-like grasp probably adding to the collection of bruises already decorating Castiel’s body; bruises that Dean had painted there. Dean angled himself just right, aiming for Cas’ prostate immediately, knowing it would drive him insane, and Cas squirmed under his weight in hopes that he could conjure some of the friction that Dean was denying him.

Dean licked the shell of Cas’ ear, “I love it when you squirm, when you’re desperate like this.” 

Dean was thrusting faster now, and Cas couldn’t take it. He lost himself to sensation. The need for release was unbearable, the hot white light filling him threatened to burst, heating his skin and ripping a sob from his mark-ridden throat.

“I can’t believe how tight you still are, Cas.” Dean punctuated his words with bites to Cas’ neck, “A slut like you, so greedy for anyone’s cock.” 

Dean’s thrusting was hard, and there was as much pain as there was pleasure. Cas sobbed and moaned, unable to stop himself, still struggling beneath Dean in search of sensation.

“But mine’s the only one that can do this to you.” Dean’s breath was hot on Cas’ neck, he couldn’t take this sensory overload much longer, “Stretching you wide, filling you up,” Dean squeezed his hand on Cas’ hip, “Making you moan like that. Such dirty sounds coming from that whore mouth of yours, angel.”

“Dean, please-” Cas’ voice came out wrecked and dripping in desperation.

“There we go,” Dean leaned in close and whispered, “’Please’ what, Cas?”

“Please, Dean-“ he gasped around ragged breaths, “I need it- I need to come- Dean, Please- Please let me come-“

“And what do you want me to do?”

Dean’s thrusting was erratic, Castiel knew he’d come soon, “Please- Make me yours, Dean-“ Cas choked out his words between frantic sobs, “Fill me up, come inside. I want to feel your come inside me- Please-“

That seemed to send Dean over the edge, and with a few ragged thrusts he was coming hard inside the fallen angel. Cas could feel the thick, hot liquid filling him up- and when Dean loosened his grip on Cas’ cock and started stroking, Castiel was completely lost. 

Cas came harder than he thought possible; his whole body went rigid and he cried out Dean’s name in his release, coating the floor beneath him. The warm white light that filled him burst from every pore of skin and his vision blurred. For a brief, fleeting moment, he felt whole. With Dean inside him as he began slipping into after glow everything was how he remembered, how it used to be.

He forgot the cold reality until Dean slid out of him, and the memory of what once was left him like a dream after waking. Castiel didn’t turn around- he knew what he’d see. He couldn’t take it, not again, so he just stood and waited. He felt Dean’s come begin to drip down his leg as Dean freed Cas’ wrists from the belt that bound them. He felt the ache where Dean had gripped his hip so tightly as he heard the zipping of jeans behind him. He rolled his shoulders, sore from the position they were in, and listened to Dean’s footsteps grow quieter as he left Cas’ cabin.

Cas was left alone again, body sore and aching. The past didn’t have a place in these encounters, and thinking about it only made things worse. This is how things were now, and Castiel knew that. But as long as Dean continued to give him brief glimpses of what they used to be, continued to make him his, he’d never get used to it.


End file.
